📄 The deeper why behind not trying to look interesting

The dictum "Be interested, not interesting" sounds straightforward enough, but there's actually many layers of depth to it.

Sure, it's respectful, and it makes your buyer feel seen, but on the next level there's the fact that unless you intentionally deploy curiosity and interest, there's a very high probability that the things you say, the things that you hope will interest your buyer, completely miss the mark.

Because unless you know - with certainty and accuracy - exactly what your buyer is interested in, you’re shooting in the dark.

You’re lobbing words and ideas at them, hoping that something will stand out so resoundingly interesting, that they ask “tell me more”.

But if you’re in that kind of conversation, know that at that moment, you’re losing the game.

It’s basically a blind-pitch guessing game, trying to get them to be interested.

And, you’ve probably experienced that the harder you try to interest people in something, the harder it is to actually get them to be interested.

If, however, you ask them what they are interested in…

Well, then you have the perfect topic of conversation, and you’ll end up making the perfect proposal, because it’ll be highly relevant to - wait for it - their interests.

Now, there’s all kinds of reasons why you might want to try and look interesting.

Can be neediness, can be ego-driven, can be to hide insecurities or maybe you badly need this deal to happen…

But the reasons don’t matter.

The only thing that matters when you are talking to a buyer, is the thing that that person is interested in.

Nothing else matters, beyond the interests of your buyers.

So if you want sales and happy buyers and the revenue that comes with it, your goal is:

Ask questions that help you learn what they are interested in.

Put differently:

When talking to a buyer, you have one job:

To be interested in them.

Get that right, and they’ll automatically start getting interested in you, and in your solution as well.